Last May the Grandparents came for a visit to see our daughter in the church musical. Ever since I can remember, whenever they visit, our daughter becomes abstinent, cranky and just plain hard to manage. I get the whole idea that kids are supposed to have fun with their Grandparents, but at what point does fun turn into unruliness? And at what point do you say enough is enough?
OK, on with the story. So it was the night before the musical and I had a couple of errands to run. I asked my mother in law if she would have my daughter make a thank you card for her music director and then dress for bed before I got home. Seems like a reasonable request, right? When I returned home about an hour later (around 8:30 p.m.), no card had been made and my daughter was playing on the computer. I asked my mother in law what they had been doing and why nothing I had requested was done? She said and I quote: "I am not gonna be the one to tell her she can't do things". What? To that I responded: "Well she wouldn't go to school either if I didn't make her. She's 9, she doesn't get to make decisions. Someone has to be the adult." I'm sure you can imagine how that went over. I know the bible says to honor thy Mother and Father and we are a Christian family, but when is it okay to set that aside and confront them about disobeying your wishes?
Since that time, there have been repeated requests from Grandma to have our daughter come for a one or two week visit without us. My husband takes frequent trips to see them so that they get to spend time with their granddaughter, but we are reluctant to let her go alone. Are we being too controlling? Is it silly for us to be concerned about their disregard for our parenting choices?
Post your comment or stories here. I would love to get another perspective on the issue!
I love your blog and will be sure to share it with others. The topics you write about are quite common and it is actually rather refreshing to find someone express it so eloquently!
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